Thunder and lightning struck viciously as I stared out my window toward the direction of Raikes house. My feet ached and my eyes burned but I couldn't bear to sleep with everything that was running through my mind.

Should I tell him that I love him and ruin our relationship, or should I just grin and bear it so that I can stay close to him? Will I be able to watch him being lovey-dovey with this new girl? Can I pretend to be friends with her when I want to rip her hair out? What if I confess and he says he loves me back? That he'd just been waiting for me to say something? What would Alicia say? Would she smile at me like she did her? Would she accept me lovingly? I've known her so many years and she's never even smiled my way.

The throbbing in my feet grew worse the more I wore a hole in the floor with my pacing. The floor creaked and my cat long since ran to another room after almost being stepped on more than once. I don't know what to do. My heart tells me that it would be wise to tell him but my mind says to just leave for the capital. Maybe I should start over somewhere else? Forget about Raike...

But how can I forget about Raike after all that he has done for me? How can I leave all that we have behind without even knowing if we could become something more? I should at least say something, shouldn't I? At least give it a try, to see what he says. Right?

Nodding I turn to my closet to change slinging the doors open in a hurry only to change my mind. I don't have time to change. I need to tell him now. Grabbing a paper umbrella and the door slammed behind me solidifying my decision.

I need to tell him how I feel before I make a decision. I need to know.

Rain obscured my vision and I ran unbothered to use the umbrella I brought, just wanting to get there as fast as I could. My clothes grew heavier with every uncovered step but I couldn't care.

Pure joy burst from my heart at the thought of finally telling him the truth. I am going to tell Raike I love him! He'll be shocked but he'll smile and tell me he'd always loved me too. He'll dump the other girl and start courting me. Maybe next season in the fall he'll propose, and we'll get married and have three children. All with unimaginably curly hair and a beautiful warm sand-like complexion from the mixing of my dark and lighter skin. Their eyes will be an earthy brown that reminds you of fresh soil and harvest. We live live and grow old together as we watch our children grow.

Time and the scenery both flew by as I ran and sooner than I had expected I was standing in front of Raike's family’s home. Loud noises could be heard from inside but I didn't take the time to figure out why.

"Raike! Raike! I need to talk to you!" I banged on his door," Raike! Open the door!" the door opened only for Alicia to be standing there.

My smile fell slightly at the sight of her instead of Raike but I wouldn't be deterred, I need to tell him today. We will be so happy together.

"Don't." Alicia's rough voice came out firm but gentle, catching me off guard and my attention at the same.

My face crunched as I questioned her words.

"Raike is happy and Amethyst is a lovely girl who comes from a great family. Don't mess this up for him. What do you have to offer him if this marriage falls through?" her tone was resolute and her stance in the doorway told me that she would not be allowing me in anytime soon.

Laughter could be heard echoing throughout the house somewhere out of sight but Raike's laugh was the loudest. "Ma! Who's at the door?!" Alicia stared at me as if daring me to say something.

I smirked and opened my mouth to reply only for him to appear in the doorway behind his mother. "Em! What great timing! I have great news for you!" he gave a jolly laugh and maneuvered around his mom with some struggle, opening the door to let me in only for Alicia to push him out and slam the door.

"Talk outside and come back in when you're done Raike!" she made sure to emphasize his name in a not-so-subtle way of reminding me I wasn't invited in, but I paid her no mind.

Raike went to apologize but I waved him away, already used to her rough and rude behavior. I could see that he was about to speak so I cut to the chase, not wanting to lose any more steam than I already had. Alicia's words had done a bigger number than I'd allowed her to see or myself to truly feel yet.

"Raike! There's something I need to tell you and I cannot hold off any longer!" my smile grew back, slightly shy and anxious but I was ready.